Who is your witness? (1John 5:1-12) 111107
I have stopped writing devotion for a few days. I felt guilty, because I thought I might have stumbled some of you and being a bad testimony (witness). This morning, as I getting myself ready for Sunday service, I come back to 1 John. Lo and behold, I was confronted again by the truth of God.
I have been struggling with my own adequacy as a servant of God and even doubt the calling He has for me. I have been really down and depressed for the pass few weeks. I am really being hard pressed all around me. My both sisters are not being well in one way or the other, my mother is definitely bad affected. My uncle passed away recently had also affected my father. Assignments, ministry responsibilities (BB GB, attachment church, cell group etc…) and other school responsibilities have not been merciful on me either. The coming of my first child also added upon me pressure beside the pleasure and joy. And of course, as I am approaching graduation (if I do), my future is also a question mark. I am really hard pressed.
But God has given me victory. John reminded me that if I am born of God, I can have victory that overcome the world, and that is my faith (v4). John interestingly used cultic (religious sacrificial) language here to remind his readers and me that Christ had paid it all and Spirit is the witness (v6-8). In other words, I am primarily accountable to God because He is my witness. The word ‘witness’ appeared at least 9 times from verses 7 to 11.
Why am I so performance oriented? Why do I have to be a witness for God while He would be my witness and witness for Himself too. I felt guilty because I believe that God’s people will suffer without my contribution and me devotion. This is utterly nonsense. God do not need me, but He can use me, a jar of clay. I am, but a creation whom God made from dust and by His grace, breathed life into. I ought to be grateful rather than full of guilt.
I am thankful for His Word. I think I really have to shift my paradigm of devotion. It is not only for the people who read. It is also not a mere duty and ritual of a Christian. But it is my time and space for God to speak and minister to me through His living Word. Let Him be my witness. Who is then your witness?
HHS…
Abel…
