Confused Judas (John 14:20-31) 100607
I am back to write my devotions and thoughts. The past one month has been really tough for me. Besides coping with the stressed from academic studies (which is bad enough), I still have to cope with my new role as a to-be-father. To be a to-be-father, the first stage is to be a paranoid father (but this is understandable because my past experience and our special condition), then the next stage is to be Mr Mariam (to take care all household chores). I must admit that I am not an excellent house servant, I am very lost and stressed whenever I have to cope and manage so many responsibilities. Then my real self emerged, a tired, tense and stress servant. And I still have to try to be a good servant to my cell group members and other ministries I am leading (BBGB, youths at Praise EFC and Student Council of SBC).
This time, I really know that I have over committed myself. I give myself no room for any breather. I planned all my ministries and camps involvement before I know about the pregnancy. So, when added responsibility comes along, I just have to try to cover ten pots with only nine (or even eight) pot covers. Only recently, past few days, after I have completed and submitted my last pieces of assignment, I can really smile from within. And I am looking forward for the two retreats I will be having in next two weeks, I am going to enjoy and play and relax and let God renews and recharges me.
As I continue to read and reflect the gospel of John, I am amazed and reminded by the words of Jesus in today’s passage. Do I love Jesus? Do I keep His commandments? Has Jesus been disclosing Himself or His will to me lately (v21)?
Judas (not Iscariot) asked Jesus a very unusual and seemingly obvious question: why did Jesus choose to disclose Himself to the disciples and not to the world (v22)? I am not sure whether you know the answer, but I think I know what would Jesus said! It was because only the disciples know about the truth of God, that is Jesus is the send from God to redeem His people to God, the people of the world do not believe that. It is because the disciples have a personal relationship with Jesus, not the people of the world. It is only the disciples will have the Holy Spirit to help them to understand and bring to remembrance of all that Jesus had taught (v26), but the people of the world cannot receive the Holy Spirit.
At the end of the day, Jesus was stressing to His disciples that He indeed had a personal relationship with God, the Father (v30). This passage is one of the most crucial passage that speaks of the doctrine of Trinity, that is God the Father, Jesus the Son and the Holy Spirit are One and yet they relate to each others in a very peculiar way. They are three distinct personalities but they are One in substance. There is no best way to explain this and I am not going to try to explain this idea of trinity here. But I want to highlight that this is something that I do not understand fully but yet I believe it is true whole heartedly. In another word, there are things that are happening around us that we can not comprehend, but we still can have faith to believe that God is still in control, if we have our relationship right with God. That is why Jesus is not disclosing Himself to the world, but only to His disciples.
Judas’ question is a question of faith, a question relationship in doubt. We ask similar questions too. For me, will I be a father if I am not faithful as a servant of God? Was it because I agree to continue to be the Student Council Chairman, then my wife gets pregnant? I don’t know. For you, maybe you have been asking, will your life be better only if you do not miss your Sunday services and pay your tithe? I don’t know. But I only know God will only disclose His will to His disciples, one who have a genuine and close relationship with Him. Are you a His disciple?
